This reading group guide for Tragedy Plus Time includes an introduction, discussion questions, ideas for enhancing your book club, and a Q&A with author Adam Cayton-Holland . The suggested questions are intended to help your reading group find new and interesting angles and topics for your discussion. We hope that these ideas will enrich your conversation and increase your enjoyment of the book. Introduction In Tragedy Plus Time , Adam Cayton-Holland tells the story of his sister Lydia''s suicide. He brings you into their shared childhood, in which Lydia was the most sensitive of the three Cayton-Holland kids, through their memories as adults beginning to find their place in the world. From a young age, Lydia felt the pain of the world deeply and intimately. Whether she encountered the loss of a family friend, the body of a dead animal on the side of the road, or even a mugger attempting to rob her at knifepoint, Lydia responded with the utmost empathy. After struggling with mental illness for years, she ultimately took her own life.
As Adam grieves Lydia''s death, he works to accept that there will be so many successes, joys, and even sorrows that he won''t get to share with his little sister. He comes to understand that grieving is not necessarily a process with a beginning and end; it''s a constant state of being with its own paradoxical highs and lows. As Adam says, "I like to remember her constantly; I try not to think of her at all." Topics & Questions for Discussion 1. Adam recalls his childhood with Lydia, where they were "always running new bits, playing new characters" (p. 31). Discuss some of their bits. What is the appeal of comedy to them and to you? How do these comedic routines help Adam and Lydia navigate the world and relate to each other? 2.
Wade Blank''s death is a formative experience for Adam and his siblings. Describe the way that each of the Cayton-Hollands reacts to this tragedy. How does Wade''s death affect Adam''s understanding of death and his worldview? 3. Discuss the chapter titles in Tragedy Plus Time . Why do you think that Cayton-Holland choose to include them? Did they affect your reading? If so, how? Were there any chapter titles you found particularly affecting? Which ones and why? 4. Patton Oswalt praised Tragedy Plus Time , saying "This book is so heartfelt and brilliant that I''ve informed my lawyers not to proceed with the lawsuit for plagiarism against the title." Oswalt previously released Tragedy Plus Comedy Equals Time , a one-hour storytelling comedy special. Discuss the meaning of the book''s title, and the special''s title.
Why do you think that Cayton-Holland chose this title for his memoir? How did it inform your reading of the book? What impact, if any, does time have on tragedy? 5. Of his freshman year in college, Adam writes, "I couldn''t shake the feeling like I wasn''t doing college right" (p. 44). What do you think "doing college right" means to him? How does Adam''s confidence suffer during his freshman year? How is Lydia''s campus visit a watershed moment for Adam? Why doesn''t he want to appear lost in front of her? 6. Adam writes, "That''s the thing no one tells you about depression. How exhausting it is to those around the person suffering" (p. 138). How does Adam convey these feelings of exhaustion? Have you had any similar experiences? If so, how did you deal with them? 7.
What, according to Adam, is the purpose of a funeral? Why does he feel that they aren''t for the family of the deceased? What do you think? On grief Adam writes, "there''s just too much. Especially with a suicide" (p. 146). What do you think he means? How does reading about other people''s experiences with loss help us process our own ecounters with it? 8. Think about Adam''s relationship with Katie. Were you surprised that they got back together? Why or why not? How does she help him deal with his grief? 9. Why does Adam''s family insist that he make his previously scheduled trip to Los Angeles after Lydia''s suicide? How might it help them? We see a moment from this trip in the prologue and then again later in the story. How does revisiting this trip again later in the narrative help you understand Adam''s state of mind? 10.
In "Litost," Adam talks about the history of mental illness in his family and how little he and his relatives spoke of the details. What do you think makes suicide and depression so difficult to talk about, even generations later? How do you think your family would handle, or has handled, a similar situation? 11. After Lydia''s funeral, Adam talks about self-mythologizing, and how it''s easy to get caught up thinking of life as a storyline with a defined arc. He realizes, "All that time you spent thinking it revolved around you, you weren''t even the main character, you idiot. [Lydia] was" (p. 147). What might be the central arc of your own life story? Do you consider yourself the main character? Why or why not? 12. Toward the end of the book, Adam writes that he understands Lydia''s pain was unbearable because "she knew she would destroy us but she had to do it anyway.
And if that''s the choice she had to make to end the misery, then I have to choose to love her for that choice" (pp. 224-225). Do you relate to Adam''s conclusion? Why or why not? 13. After Lydia''s death, Adam was visited repeatedly by a hawk. When he shared this with his mother, "she looked at me with wide eyes and we both just knew. That was her. That was Lydia. She was trying to reach us.
She was trying to show us how beautiful and strong she still was" (p. 210). How did this experience hold a measure of healing for Adam as he felt his sister''s presence again? Do you believe that people who have passed may visit loved ones in some form after death? Enhance Your Book Club 1. Tragedy Plus Time has drawn comparisons to Dave Eggers''s A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. Read both books and discuss them with your book club. Do you think the comparisons are apt? Were there any similarities in the ways that Adam Cayton-Holland and Dave Eggers came to terms with their grief? 2. Learn more about the mental health resources in your area and on a national level. What therapists, medical practitioners, and other mental health professionals are available near you? Research national mental health organizations and suicide prevention centers, such as the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (https://afsp.
org), that can be vital for those struggling with mental health and share these resources with your community. 3. Adam''s comedic trio christens themselves the Grawlix. What does the name mean? Watch their Web series at http://www.funnyordie.com/thegrawlix and discuss it with your book club. Adam says that the name of the trio "was perfect, obscure, and pretentious" (p. 92).
Do you agree? Why or why not? 4. To learn more about Adam Cayton-Holland, listen to and watch some of his routines. Find out when he will be in a city near you by visiting his official site at adamcaytonholland.com A Conversation with Adam Cayton-Holland Congratulations on the publication of Tragedy Plus Time. In your memoir, you talk about working on Those Who Can''t both for you and for Lydia. Did you feel the same about writing this book? Absolutely. I suppose it was more for me than her, though. I mean, I wanted the book to serve as a sort of tribute to her, but it wasn''t like she necessarily wanted or needed that.
Though I think she would really like it. But it was something I needed to do as part of my mourning process. I think that''s why my family was okay with it, even though it''s hard to have all we went through aired publicly. We all respect whatever the others have to do to grieve. As your career progresses, you "learned to read an audience . and [you were] giving them what they wanted" (p. 89). When you were writing your memoir, was there a specific audience that you kept in mind? Can you tell us about any notable differences between writing stand-up and writing your memoir? There was no audience I kept in mind, other than my family.
The last thing you want when you go through something like this is to bring more pain upon the family. So they were the only ones I was thinking of when I wrote the book. And Lydia of course. But she''s family. Writing stand-up and writing a memoir are obviously quite different experiences; for one you have way more time to explain what you''re getting at. Stand-up audiences aren''t as patient. But I''ve heard people describe stand-up comedy as "a search to sound like yourself on stage." Writing a memoir could be described as, "a search to sound like yourself on page.
" So in a lot of ways, I suppose, they''re similar. Early in your memoir, you talk about giving a mandatory ninth-grade speech, saying that the experience was "so unilaterally terrifying that [the speeches] were off-limits from standard ridicule" (p. 38). What prompted you to approach your speech in such a different manner than your classmates? Were you worried about how it would be received? Can you share parts of it with us? Ha. I wish I could find that top ten list. I tried for the book, but it''s long gone. I think I just knew that I was funny--or at least I was sick of being totally ignored. I think I was coming out of my middle school shell.
I was really resenting the kids I was going to school with and just sort of done with it. So there was a certain I''ll-show-you-.