Patience James My life is complicated. It's complicated, stressful and, oftentimes, overwhelming, but I would not trade it for anything in the world. Men have not made it any easier. I do not know if they are taught the "macking game" in elementary school, but by the time most boys reach high school, their main objectives in life are getting paid and making sure that girls get played. The first boy ever to break my heart was named Kevin. Two years after he made me want to evaporate after embarrassing me in the hallway at school when he dumped me for Claire, I looked back on it and wondered what I had ever seen in his ass. I graduated from high school having had three serious relationships and many others that lasted no more than a few weeks and consisted of a bunch of late-night phone calls, provocative talk that led absolutely nowhere, and not a single real date. I have always had the gift of gab, as my mother calls it.

She claims that I came out of the womb ready to shout, kick ass, and take names. It is true that I am the most determined person I know. My family calls me stubborn and I have no problem claiming that, if stubborn means that I want to achieve my goals in life. Failure is not an option for me, and I come from a family full of people who share a similar strength of mind. Sometimes it can be like the clash of the titans in the James household, but everyone is always supportive of one another. From an early age, I knew that I would end up doing something that involved convincing others to do something. As it turned out, during my senior year of college, I got an intern position at Flava Cosmetics. That was the big break that I was looking for, and I was determined to impress everyone from the CEO to the receptionist.

I strutted into the office like I owned the joint from day one. I had all sorts of marketing ideas for the various cosmetic lines, and people loved them, everyone except for Kerrigan, but that is a different story for a different day. Let's just say that Kerrigan is the thorn in my side, but the majority of the time I pay no heed to the ignoramus. We have our moments, but it is all good in competition. It helps to keep me on my toes. Kerrigan does not realize that women need a different slant on marketing from men. Men will be satisfied with half-naked women in ads looking like they want to fuck the living daylights out of somebody. Yes, sexuality can go a long way in advertisements, but "sensuality" can go a whole lot farther.

Women do not want to feel threatened when they look at ads. In other words, women want to see advertisements featuring women who look like them, not some impossible dream version of them. A lot of companies, like Dove soap, are catching on by embracing normal-looking women in their ads and commercials. Average women, especially women of color, are not a size four and do not look like they stepped out ofPlayboy.They look.normal. Let me quit talking about my job. You can see that I am passionate about it, and that is what matters in life: being passionate about what you do -- and whom you love.

Love. That can be a good or dirty word for me, depending on the time period in my life. I have had many good men in my life, but all of them eventually faltered and none of them appreciated me until I was history. Devon wanted to control me. I was not then nor am I now the one for that. William had a big heart but he also had a big recreational drug problem. He had to go, but we remain friends. Lincoln was my cheater, the man who wanted to be in a committed relationship without actually making a commitment.

I am sure he is somewhere, at this very second, trying to convince a sister to drop her drawers. Lincoln, ironically since he was the one trying to fuck everything moving, was the most difficult to get rid of. He was so full of himself and so conceited that he never fathomed that I would dump him after he cheated. To this day, he stil.