1 Honor Your Greatness A simple idea that''s too often neglected. To appreciate you. For all you''ve gone through and all you''ve become. For all the fears you''ve faced and found freedom from. For the dreams you not only dreamed but had the bravery to make real. For all the people you''ve helped and for all the good you have done. You matter more than you know. So please do not measure your worthiness by what the majority tells you that you should be, do and have.
You being here with me is no accident, at all. Something in you--in a culture where too many fine people are sleepwalking through their most precious hours in a digital slumber--seeks something higher. I sense that although life can be hard at times, you have not lost your hope. You''ve protected your optimism for your brighter future and trusted that call within your soul to fully realize your ethical ambitions for all the time you get to live. This--to my getting-sort-of-old eyes--makes you a hero. You''ve been through a lot. You could have given up. And become jaded, cynical, critical, and closed-hearted.
Yet, instead, here you are. Ready to rise, passionate to advance and dedicated to grow through the guidance you are receiving through me, as your mentor. It''s an act of high courage to be willing to let go of who you were yesterday to become someone even better, wiser, healthier, and happier tomorrow, you know? Oh, and I really should reinforce that personal development work is the best work you could ever do. A lot of people snicker or roll their eyes (or both) when they hear the term "self-improvement." Yet what is more courageous and sensible than steadily and incrementally doing the deep training to turn everyday human insecurity into rare-air confidence, personal limitation into uncommon prowess, and an average mode of rolling through life into a breathtakingly exceptional journey that honors the promise you have been born into? "The most important investment you can make is in yourself," noted renowned financier Warren Buffett. And the finest strategy to make the world better is to make yourself better, right? As you rework, elevate and calibrate your inner universe, your relationship with what I call in my mentoring methodology your Heroic Self (which is the opposite of your Egoic Self, the false, faulty, restricted, and scared part of you that has been formed by the negative beliefs and human hurts that you''ve endured in your past) will definitely increase. And when your primary relationship with your greatest self increases, every other relationship in your life increases too. Build stronger knowledge and intimacy with your Heroic Self (through the philosophies and tools I''ll walk you through) and your relationship with your family, vitality, work, prosperity, community, adventure, and service to others will fly with it.
By the way, you should know right now that I come from humble beginnings. No silver spoon in my mouth. Born in Africa. Came from immigrant parents. Two years ago, I took my life partner, Elle, to see the house I grew up in. The current owner was watering the lawn when we walked up to the place. I told him that I used to live in his home, over fifty years ago. So he invited us in.
Nice man. Smiled a lot. After we left, Elle said, "That''s the smallest house I''ve ever seen." I felt the same way. And I grew up with a ton of flaws--as all humans do. Filled with thoughts of scarcity, emotions of timidity, sensations of insecurity and methods of operating that chained my talents, restrained my optimism, and smothered my freedom. Yet one thing saved--and transformed--me: a limitless (and sometimes obsessive) love of growth. If I didn''t know how to improve something, I could learn how to do it.
All I longed to become and everything I dreamed of experiencing could happen by enriching my understanding. Of course, you can do this too. Which is why I''m so excited for you. As I write these words, I am reminded of what the philosopher and writer Ayn Rand wrote: Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won, it exists, it is real, it''s yours. Such are the wishes that I hold dear for you. 2 Live The Outer Change Follows Inner Change Law As I write you this mentoring message I do hope you''re in great spirits, full of enthusiasm (what a great word that is!), and in hot pursuit of a gorgeous life that you''ll be proud of when you''re an old-timer.
And if you''re already an old-timer, then my prayer is that you''re already proud of your life. I was up at three this morning (went to sleep just after 9 PM) so I could meditate, visualize, and pray. Then I hopped onto my elliptical machine. It''s my favorite piece of exercise equipment, unless we include my trusted mountain bike. That one''s tops for me. When I first met Elle--on our second date, to be accurate--the first thing I showed her when she visited my home was my mountain bike. She later confided that she thought that was a little strange. But all these years later she''s still with me.
So I guess it was an okay move. Anyway, I need to share a story. One evening a father sat in his favorite chair, reading a newspaper. His young son sat near him. "Dad, let''s play," the boy said cheerfully. But the man was too busy being an adult and kept on studying his paper. "Daddy, let''s play! Let''s have fun," the little boy said. Yet the father paid him no attention.
He continued his reading. The child persisted and the man ignored him. Finally, the father had an idea. There was a picture of the globe in the newspaper, so he tore it out, ripped it into dozens of pieces, and handed it to his son, saying, "Here, go put this back together," thinking it would take the child a long time to do it. Yet children come to us more highly evolved than adults to teach us the lessons we need to learn. And after only a few minutes the boy came back with the globe perfectly back together. "How''d you do that, Son?" the father asked, astonished. "Easy, Dad.
On the other side of the globe was a person. And once I got the person together, the world was okay." Powerful idea, right? Once you get yourself together, your world will be okay--more than okay. Fantastic, actually, if you practice the philosophies, methods, routines, and tactics that I''m super excited to share with you (nothing works for someone unwilling to do any work, yes?). One of the brain tattoos I love sharing with my audiences when I do a keynote presentation in some city across this small planet is this: "Victims make excuses; leaders deliver results." To be a leader doesn''t mean you must have a title, a position, authority, or a ton of money. Nope, not at all. Leadership''s just the opposite of victimhood.
And human beings giving away their power to create wonderful results by complaining, blaming, and expecting others to make things better for them are people caught in the trap of playing the victim. The other day I was in a ride-sharing car with a cool young driver. As we chatted, he shared that he arrived as an immigrant with $260 in his pocket. That was all the money he had in his life. Yet, by his focus, hard work, and relentless desire to grow, he saved up enough to buy a house and was now supporting eleven (yes, eleven!) of his family members. He could have complained of his hard past, blamed his mean childhood, and waited for something outside of himself to improve his days. But he didn''t. He started small, made steady daily gains, and transformed his situation over time.
This ride-share driver delivered results instead of making excuses. And he told me his real secret was his deep dedication to constant self-improvement, which is really all about growth--the first form of wealth. For some reason this man''s story makes me think of the words of the warrior poet Charles Bukowski: "Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?" We should end this chapter on that. Because I need a break from writing and my trusty mountain bike is waiting for me.