On the day he was celebrating the first day of his honeymoon, "Michael McCarthy" was erased - every aspect of self-identity, gone in an instant. This book is an autobiographical narrative describing in detail one man's journey through the mind-shattering loss of the person we take for granted we are. The subsequent search for reality leads through every available spiritual path, religion and consciousness raising discipline from every culture. The author's search for 'The Holy Why?" plumbs the darkest depths of human suffering. The journey through the inner realms to the awakening process of the Soul is a clearly delineated and poetic description of the equally bizarre worlds of experiential spirituality, and quantum physics. All of it interwoven with scientific breakthroughs in brain chemistry research that lead to a true spiritual awakening and the return to conscious living. The book has been called .".

a lucid and comforting delineation of the things most people are afraid to talk about" that is guaranteed to entertain while enlightening. A psychological and spiritual quest far beyond belief, fulfilling the great promise of neuroscience. Both hemispheres of the brain get their "Ah, ha " moment. Heartbreaking, mind-shattering and often funny, it is a clearly delineated journal of real, in our time, spiritual awakening What do you do when you have done everything "right" - and the most absolutely "wrong" thing possible befalls you? When you no longer have any concept of what "Right" or "Wrong" might actually be, where do you go? What is it you should even seek to try to make sense of the senseless? In the horror of an idyllic life gone mad, where do we go? And how do we get there from here? An internationally honored and recognized spiritual artist, Nanette Crist, described her experience with the first chapters, thus: "I cried in his confusion and pain . and then laughed as he challenged - demanded - that God reveal Himself. And then, I saw God.".