Every vampire love story has been done before, right? The girl falls in love with the dark, brooding boy. The boy is tempted to bite her, pushes her away, only to come running back when she's in supernatural danger from someone else. To try and find a new spin on the vampire tale would be silly, as silly as letting yourself get bitten by spiders over and over in the hopes that you'll get superpowers and not have to wear your glasses anymore.Lavender is the girl who falls in love with Simon, the boy. He is tempted to bite her, but doesn't push her away. She's 22 and he looks 28 when they get married. Though the two are from Portland, Oregon, the entire story takes place aboard the Alaska Railroad, where they are celebrating their 50th anniversary. There are terrorists and unexpected sunshine and beautiful Alaskan scenery.

More than that, however, this tale poses new questions.what happens to a vampire/human couple when one of them gets old? When Lavender realizes that she won't ever be able to have kids with him? When it dawns on her that she can't kiss him in public because she looks old enough to be his grandma? When it dawns on Simon just how difficult it is to protect her as a vampire in a wheelchair? When Simon is faced with losing her or driving a stake into his own chest, what will love make him do? With cliffhangers left and right and with an ending full of twists, "I am not a Hero" explores new plots in vampire lore. Wheelchairs, guns, terrorists, railroads, blood, allergies, Nazi's.the question is, is all that as crazy as letting yourself get bitten by all those spiders? Yes? GOOD!.