Harbour I Banished Where the waves thunder and the storms cry. Where the breakers crash and the salt water whirls, that is where the place that is ours rises from the sea. The legacy that passes from father to son. LENNART ALBINSSON--RÅDMANSÖ The sea has given and the sea has taken away Who flies there in the feather-harbour, who climbs up there out of the black, shining waters? GUNNAR EKELÖF--TJÄRVEN Sea buckthorn Three thousand years ago, Domarö was nothing but a large, flat rock sticking up out of the water, crowned by an erratic boulder the ice had left behind. One nautical mile to the east it was possible to glimpse the round shape that would later rise out of the sea and be given the name Gåvasten. Apart from that, there was nothing. It would be another thousand years before the surrounding islets and islands dared to poke their heads above the water, beginning the formation of the archipelago that goes under the name of Domarö archipelago today. By that time the sea buckthorn had already arrived on Domarö.
Down below the enormous block left by the ice, a shoreline had formed. There in the scree the sea buckthorn worked its way along with its creeping roots, the hardy shrub finding nourishment in the rotting seaweed, growing where there was nothing to grow in, clinging to the rocks. Sea buckthorn. Toughest of the tough. And the sea buckthorn produced new roots, crept up over thewater''s edge and grew on the slopes until a metallic-green border surrounded the uninhabited shores of Domarö like a fringe. Birds snatched the fiery yellow berries that tasted of bitter oranges and flew with them to other islands, spreading the gospel of the sea buckthorn to new shores, and within a few hundred years the green fringe could be seen in all directions. But the sea buckthorn was preparing its own destruction. The humus formed by its rotting leaves was richer than anything the stony shores could offer, and the alder saw its chance.
It set its seeds in the mulch left by the sea buckthorn, and it grew stronger and stronger. The sea buckthorn was unable to tolerate either the nitrogen-rich soil produced by the alder, or the shade from its leaves, and it withdrew down towards the water. With the alder came other plants that needed a higher level of nutrition, competing for the available space. The sea buckthorn was relegated to a shoreline that grew far too slowly, just half a metre in a hundred years. Despite the fact that it had given birth to the other plants, the sea buckthorn was displaced and set aside. And so it sits there at the edge of the shore, biding its time. Beneath the slender, silky green leaves there are thorns. Big thorns.
Two small people and a large rock (July 1984) They were holding hands. He was thirteen and she was twelve. If anyone in the gang caught sight of them, they would just die right there on the spot. They crept through the fir trees, alert to every sound and every movement as if they were on some secret mission. In a way they were: they were going to be together, but they didn''t know that yet. It was almost ten o''clock at night, but there was still enough light in the sky for them to see each other''s arms and legs as pale movements over the carpet of grass and earth still holding the warmthof the day. They didn''t dare look at each other''s faces. If they did, something would have to be said, and there were no words.
They had decided to go up to the rock. A little way along the track between the fir trees their hands had brushed against each other''s, and one of them had taken hold, and that was it. Now they were holding hands. If anything was said, something straightforward would become difficult. Anders'' skin felt as if he had been out in the sun all day. It was hot and painful all over, and he felt dizzy, as if he had sunstroke; he was afraid of tripping over a root, afraid of his hand becoming sweaty, afraid that what he was doing was out of order in some way. There were couples in the gang. Martin and Malin were together now.
Malin had gone out with Joel for a while. It was OK for them to lie there kissing when everybody could see them, and Martin said he and Malin had got as far as petting down by the boathouses. Whether or not it was true, it was OK for them to say--and do--that kind of thing. Partly because they were a year older, partly because they were good-looking. Cool. It gave them licence to do a lot of things, and to use a different language too. There was no point in trying to keep up, that would be embarrassing. You just had to sit there staring, trying to laugh in the right places.
That''s just how it was. Neither Anders nor Cecilia was a loser. They weren''t outsiders like Henrik and Björn--Hubba and Bubba--but they weren''t part of the clique that made the rules and decided which jokes were funny, either. For Anders and Cecilia to be walking along holding hands was utterly ridiculous. They knew this. Anders was short and borderline spindly, his brown hair too thin for him to give it any kind of style. He didn''t understand how Martin and Joel did it. He''d tried slicking his hair back with gel once, but it looked weird and he''d rinsed it out before anyone saw it.
There was something flat about Cecilia. Her body was angular and her shoulders were broad, despite the fact that she was slim. Virtually no hips or breasts. Her face looked small between thosebroad shoulders. She had medium-length fair hair and an unusually small nose dusted with freckles. When she put her hair up in a ponytail, Anders thought she looked really pretty. Her blue eyes always looked just a little bit sad, and Anders liked that. She looked as if she knew.
Martin and Joel didn''t know. Malin and Elin didn''t know. They had the feeling, said the right things and were able to wear sandals without looking stupid. But they didn''t know. They just did things. Sandra read books and was clever, but there was nothing in her eyes to indicate that she knew. Cecilia knew, and Anders could see that she knew, which proved that he knew as well. They recognised one another.
He couldn''t explain what it was that they knew, but it was something. Something about life, about how things really were. The terrain grew steeper, and as they made their way up towards the rock the trees thinned out. In a minute or two they would have to let go of one another''s hands so they''d be able to climb. Anders stole a glance at Cecilia. She was wearing a yellow and white striped T-shirt with a wide neckline that revealed her collarbone. It was just unbelievable that she had been linked to him for what must be five minutes, that her skin had been touching his. That she''d been his.
She had been his for five minutes. Soon they would let go, move apart and become ordinary people again. What would they say then? Anders looked down. The ground was starting to become stony, he had to watch where he was putting his feet. Every second he was expecting Cecilia to let go, but she didn''t. He thought perhaps he was holding on so tightly that she couldn''t let go. It was an embarrassing thought, so he loosened his grip slightly. Then she let go.
He spent the two minutes it took to climb up the rock analysing whether he had, in fact, been holding her hand too tightly, or whether loosening his grip had made her think he was about to let go, and so she let go first. Regardless of what he knew or did not know, he was convincedthat Joel and Martin never had this kind of problem. He wiped his hand furtively on his trousers. It was slightly stiff and sweaty. When they reached the top of the rock, his head felt bigger than usual. The blood was humming in his ears and he was sure his face was bright red. He stared down at his chest where a little ghost looked out from a circle with a red line through it. Ghostbusters .
It was his favourite top, and it had been washed so many times that the outline of the ghost was becoming blurred. ''It''s so beautiful.'' Cecilia was standing at the edge of the rock looking out over the sea. They were up above the tops of the trees. Far below they could see the holiday village where almost all their friends lived. Out at sea the ferry to Finland was sailing along, a cluster of lights moving across the water. Further away and further out there were other archipelagos whose names Anders didn''t know. He stood as close to her as he dared and said, ''I think it''s the most beautiful thing in the world,'' and regretted it as soon as the words were out of his mouth.
It was a stupid thing to say, and he tried to improve matters by adding, ''That''s one way of looking at it'', but that wasn''t right either. He moved away from her, following the edge of the rock. When he had walked all the way round, a distance of perhaps thirty metres, and was almost back with her, she said, ''It''s odd, isn''t it? This rock, I mean?'' He had an answer to that. ''It''s an erratic boulder. According to my dad, anyway.'' ''What''s that?'' He gazed out across the sea, fixed his eyes on the Gåvasten lighthouse and tried to remember what his father had told him. Anders made a sweeping movement with his arm, taking in the surrounding area. The old village, the mission, the alarm bell next to the shop.
''Well.when there was ice. Coverin.