1 Rosebud Cottage, Winchelsea January 1813 "I''m very sorry to tell you this, Miss Cochrane, but there is more and it isn''t good." Mr. Jollis, her mother''s solicitor, didn''t sound sorry at all. He sounded unaccountably pleased, which was strange, surely, but she held silent, not only because of her grief over her mother''s death but because she was used to holding herself silent. It was a habit of many years. Over time, she''d learned a lot about people, simply listening and watching them as they spoke. She realized in that moment, in Mr. Jollis''s meaningful pause, that her father didn''t yet know of her mother''s death.
She''d forgotten him in the suddenness of it, in the numbness it had instilled in her. Now, there was no one else to tell him. She had to write to him herself. She could see him reading her words, see his disbelief, his bowing pain when he finally realized it was true. She closed her eyes a moment against the pain she knew he would feel. He would feel endless pain, for he loved her mother more than he loved any other human being. But her mother, alive and laughing one moment, was dead the next. Her death was so needless, so stupid really: a wretched carriage accident, the shaft snapping for no apparent reason, sending the carriage hurtling off the winding road that ran too close above on the chalk South Downs cliffs, near Ditchling Beacon.
Those cliffs rose eight hundred and thirteen feet into the air, then plunged to the deserted beach below. Her mother was killed instantly, but her body was washed out with the tide and never recovered. At least it hadn''t been recovered yet, and it had already been a day and a half. She looked up when Mr. Jollis cleared his throat, evidently prepared to finish his thought. "As I said, Miss Cochrane," Mr. Jollis continued, that smug tone coming more to the surface now, "I am very sorry about this but Rosebud Cottage is leased and the lessor is your, er, father, Lord Chase." "I didn''t know that.
" Indeed, she''d always assumed that her mother owned the cottage. But then again, perhaps that was the way of it when a man supported and kept a woman. All remained his, thus he retained his power and all his prerogatives. It was merely another unexpected blow that she didn''t feel at the moment. She waited, silent, her body utterly still. His face changed then, and he was looking at her differently, not as a man feigning sympathy for a bereaved daughter, but as a man assessing a woman for his own uses. She''d seen the look before, but not that many times on that many male faces. She''d been protected, but now, she realized, she was unprotected.
Her father was in Yorkshire and she was here, quite alone, except for dear Badger. "I must write my father," she said then, her voice curt, colder than it would normally be, but she wanted him to go away. "I imagine that since the lease will run out soon that I will have to go to Chase Park." "There is another option, perhaps," Mr. Jollis said, and he leaned toward her, like a hound on a scent, she thought, eyeing him with more hostility than she''d eyed anyone in her entire life. "No, there isn''t," she said, her voice as cold as the ice shards hanging from the cottage eaves outside. "Perhaps," he said, still sitting forward, his right hand outstretched toward her now, "just perhaps his lordship won''t want you to live at Chase Park." "His wife died seven months ago, just before my yearly visit.
I cannot imagine that he wouldn''t want me there. She was the only one who didn''t care for my presence, and that, I suppose, is very understandable. She held him as her husband, but she didn''t have his regard. I have long understood her bitterness. However, now she is dead." "Ah, but now his lordship must be very careful, you understand, Miss Cochrane. His lordship is in mourning, very deep mourning. All his neighbors will be watching him closely, indeed, all society, all those whose opinions are important to him, will be watching him closely.
" "Why? Surely he won''t wed again, at least not anytime soon. I am merely his bastard daughter. Who would care if I lived at Chase Park or not?" "People would care and they would find out very quickly. It shows the ultimate disrespect for his dead wife, Miss Cochrane. You must believe me, for I know the ways of society and you do not." She didn''t believe him, but she didn''t wish to argue with him anymore. "I do not believe men are watched all that closely, only women," she said, her voice remote. "Nor do I believe that men mourn anything all that deeply for all that long a time.
" Her body became even more still, even though she could feel herself shrinking back from his still outstretched hand. She remembered when her father''s wife had died. His reaction, she''d thought during her visit, when the countess had finally died birthing another babe, had been one of profound relief. When tears had wet his eyes, she knew it was from the death of the small infant boy, dead two hours after its birth, not from his wife''s expiration. "That is possible," he said. "But you have no one to look after you now, Miss Cochrane. Perhaps you should consider looking for someone well circumstanced who would protect you and keep you in this lovely little cottage." She smiled at him.
Mr. Jollis, like everyone else who knew her for a long time, was startled at the smile. It was beautiful and it made him feel warm all the way to the bunions on his toes. She had two dimples and her teeth were small and white and as perfect as her smile. He could not recall ever seeing her smile before. "If I choose to remain here at the cottage, will you tell me who owns it?" "It is Squire Archibald, but surely since you have so little money, you cannot consider keeping the lease. Why it''s absurd, it''s-" She rose, her hands by her sides. "I should like you to leave now, Mr.
Jollis. If there is more I need to know, please write me a letter." He rose then as well, for he had no choice, at least not at the moment, and stared down at her, her beautiful smile forgotten. "You think to be above yourself, Miss Cochrane. No matter, you''re a bastard, nothing more, and that''s what you will always be. You cannot remain here. The lease on the cottage ends on the fifteenth of next month, and you will have no money to renew it. Squire Archibald is all of seventy and certainly not a candidate for your wiles.
No, it is money he would require, not you warming his ancient bed. You will leave then. If your esteemed father wants you, then, he will give you a home, but for how long? Don''t forget, your beautiful mother is dead. Do you truly believe he ever wanted you? No, it was your mother he wanted, no other, certainly not you. I would consider becoming your protector, Miss Cochrane-" Her face was very pale now, her eyes dulling in her rage, but he saw only the dullness, not the fury, for she just stared at him, then turned on her heel and left the small drawing room without a word. Mr. Jollis didn''t know what to do. Would she consider his well-phrased proposal? He thought her uppity, arrogant, but that would change.
He wondered if she was a virgin. He wasn''t left to wonder anything then, for Badger, the servant who had stood as protector to both Mrs. Cochrane and the Duchess, appeared in the doorway. He was a large man, well muscled, ugly as a fence post, his hair white and thick as a prophet''s, and at this moment, there was blood in his eye. Mr. Jollis backed up a step. "Sir," Badger said gently, too gently, "it is time to remove your carcass from the premises. If your carcass isn''t absent within a very few number of seconds, I will have to see that his lordship learns of your most regrettable behavior.
He won''t be pleased." "Ha," Mr. Jollis said, for he knew that this man didn''t know what he was talking about. "His lordship would be glad to get the little bastard off his hands and no mistake about that. Soon, Badger, you will be without money yourself, for she has none to pay you. Then, I daresay, you won''t speak to your betters like this. It doesn''t matter that you have more wits than you should, that you have excellent speech-who taught you to speak like a gentleman?-no matter, you''re still here and you''re nothing but a servant, of no account at all." Badger just smiled at him, shook his head, was on him in an instant, lifting him bodily, and tucked him under his mighty arm.
He carried him to the front door, and dumped him out onto the frozen ground, that would, in five months, bloom wildly with the Duchess''s red, yellow, and white roses. He turned back into the cottage, saw the Duchess, and grinned, showing a goodly-sized space between his front teeth. "He''ll rest a bit in the snow, but he''s all right, don''t you worry." He picked up her hand and made it into a fist. "Now, Duchess, I''ve told you how to swing and strike and keep your thumb tucked under. Why didn''t you knock him over the flower box?" She tried to smile, she truly did, but her face seemed as frozen as the earth outside. "I just didn''t want to see him anymore, Badger." "No wonder," he said and gave her back her hand.
"But don''t forget now, if a fellow goes beyond the line, you shove his choppers down his throat, that or you slam your knee upward as hard as you can." "I will. I promise. Thank you, Badger." He grunted and took himself off to the kitchen to prepare the curry sauce for the chicken, currently roasting gently over the open grate. The cook and maid-Miss Priss, Badger had always called her-had left for Welford-on-Avon to see her ailing aunti.